Great Sex Causes Us To See Our Partners In A Hot Way


A great side effect of incredible sex with your partner is the red-colored glasses effect, as I call it. I’ve talked before about a specific kind of respect you give (and get) for being really good in bed. You get that too, but also you get…

an excitement to see them and be with them. A happiness that has mixed with it the fact that you want to have sex with them again ASAP. You’ll feel this on a stronger level when you see them naked during non-sex times like getting ready for work or showering.

I’ve said it before and I’ll not stop saying it: it’s one thing to have someone with a body that is attractive to you. It’s a double-down on desire when you know that body has sexual skills too; can make you orgasm several times, or do exotic sexual acts that you can’t find with just anyone out there.

Even if you aren’t smoking yet, you’d be amazed at the power of great sex to cause the person you’re doing it with to be blind to imperfections. Who cares about a little extra cellulite or no washboard abs when you can make them come that hard and how many different times and ways?

We see articles out all the time about how to see your partner in that early-relationship way again, or at least in a more romantic way. In my experience, there’s no more effective way to see your partner romantically than by knowing you’re good at sex with each other. Having can’t-wait-to-do-it-again, erotic, orgasmic sex with a person is one of the obvious cornerstones of a relationship that would fit into the romantic catagory, but our culture tends to steer away from valuing sex. Not in my world.

So yes, in my kung-fu, you can’t have a real red-colored glasses romantic relationship without hot sex. You can’t drive a car with no engine. Yes, you can have it in your collector’s garage, look at it, and imagine driving it, but you aren’t driving it. In other words, you’re getting only a partial benefit from your relationship.

I’ve had clients who have smoking hot spouses and partners and never to barely physically enjoy that body and beauty out of sex fears from the culture, upbringing, or sex skills issues, or they get into ruts and too used to each other what they always do in bed. I say to people to shake the, out of fear and ruts, “Oh, so you’re immortal and you’re going to get to have great sex in say, 1,500 years from now, if you’re in the mood or are tired of living in fear by then?”

The one thing I read over and over in sex self-help books in my teens was people who said, as they say to me now, “I wish I would have known/had access to this 15+ years ago!” Don’t wish you could go back in time years from now. Start your coaching sessions today and then you can go out and get a boss pair of red-colored glasses to commemorate the day you woke up feeling that way about your honey everyday.

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